It's been such a long time since I have written in my journal.  Things have happened and I have not been able to really describe how I feel about it all.

As a family, we have decided to travel extensively in a trailer.  Once the decision was made everyone went into this weird mode of downsizing everything, including Peyton Place.  At one point, it was decided that only I and one OTHER could fit in the trailer with Dukkelisa and her husband.  This meant the OTHERS had to go and a special OTHER could come live with us.

I knew this was going to affect me and I stepped in and convinced Dukkelisa that I wanted Selby to come live with us instead of a complete stranger.  Poor Selby had never had a family (at least not she can remember) and I really liked her.  So she was adopted and lives here with us now.  This is Selby.  She got wild and crazy hair.



It didn't take long and then this strange fox started hanging around.  Everyone kept talking about the fox, but I didn't see him for the longest time.  It was like he was avoiding me or something.  Then, I finally meet him and he gives me a pair of ballerina slippers like it was suppose to mean something important.  Well, I can't dance and I am not graceful so why I have these shoes I don't know.  He gets all mystical on me, saying I don't know who I am yet.

Anyways, Tante Karin ended up all alone after her sisters left and I invited her to come live with us.  She has the cutest little baby named Kameko.  It's wonderful having her, she cooks for Selby and me and keeps house.  In a way, things have kinda settled down.  I cut my hair and went back to my black hair colour.  I have been trying to find "my style" and spending a lot of time looking at pictures of fashions throughout history.  I have been really busy with my online courses, I am at the point that I can go to real school next fall.  Selby and I are both being home-schooled by Tante Karin right now.

Okay, I guess that is enough catching up stuff.  I need to go find Dukkelisa and talk to her about my style.  I have a couple of ideas....

So many things have been happening lately.  A new, or should I say a very old boy is coming to live with us.  I just hope he stays as far away from me as possible.  Then Lars finally communicating and now I have a mystery on my hands. 

At least I got  new Christmas dress!  It's really neat and full of candy canes.  I think we get to decorate today too.  I am getting really excited about Christmas!

I am being haunted by a ghost!

Yesterday Dukkelisa worked all day on a dress for me.  It is really two dresses, a sheer striped dress with a dark green (almost brown) over dress. The sheer sleeves show and so does the bottom edge under the green dress.  I really like it and told Dukkelisa that I like this kind of dress that can be mixed and matched and layered.

I am still reading the letters form Lars.  He was such an incredible man.  I feel such a strange feeling come over me when I hold a letter from him.  Almost as though he is there with me in the room.  I like to keep the letters close to me because I know that he once touched them and carried them in his pocket.

Today we are going to a family Thanksgiving dinner.  I get to wear my new dress.  Olivia is coming too, so I am sure she will get all the attention.  I will write more this evening.  Everyone is getting ready for breakfast and I have to go.

I have been reading the letters.  I am so fascinated by him!  I stayed up all night last night and I could hardly open my eyes, when Dukkelisa woke me up at 5 am for this.

I finally got a chance to further explore the contents of the wooden chest.  I was really surprised at all teh things it held and what they could have meant.  I know now who they belonged to and I am reading the letters.  It's kinda spooky in a way, I think that discovering things that belonged to a real person who you know is now dead makes it seem like a time connection or something.

Dukkelisa reminded me of having one more week to make a decision about Nan and Bess being able to stay or whether they should move on.  It's too heavy of a decision for me to make!  I don't want to have that kind of power.  Bess is a darling, but Nan and I don't get along so well.  She is too young for me to relate to.  Bess is a baby, and so easy to care for, but then I wonder why I even have a baby to care for.  Sheesh, I am  not a mother or anything.  Why can't they just go live with Tante Karin or something?

Anyways, I am really fascinated by the things in the chest.  He has a name and he had a life.  I can't wait to read all the letters!

I have been with Dukkelisa a whole year now.  She wanted to make it my birthday, but I wanted to have a birthday AND an anniversary.  It could more fun that way!  Dukkelisa made a video of the first year we experienced together.  It seems strange to watch all those photo's go by and how much we went through.  I mostly see what she wanted me to be in the pictures, but I think she is finally understanding that I have to be myself and even if I have to experiment sometimes with my name and my looks; I am still me inside.  In the beginning of the video she tried on different colours of hair.  It was kind of unfair to have to select hair and eyes before leaving the store and being in a rush, but I really tried telling her I wanted modern hair like the pink wig and not something making me look older and storybook like.  She panicked and made me look like a romantic character.  I wanted to please her, so I went along with it.  Now things have changed and now I have to find a way to tell her what I really want my name to be.  I get to pick my birthday day AND a new name if I want to! 

Halloween was really fun.  I think I would like to have more parties in the future.  I thought it felt spooky and I kept thinking someone was whispering to me, but I guess that is what all the fun is about.  I haven't had a chance to get back into the castle to looked through the wooden chest.  Baby Bess has come down with a cold an I have been taking care of her.  Dukkelisa said that while she was doing my faceup that I looked a little jaundiced in the face again and needed to take my medicine.  Yuck how that tastes bad!

So life goes on and we start another year.  I really hope I have an adventure....one that is my own and not one that Dukkelisa come up with!

I get a new faceup.

Just when I thought nothing interesting could happen, it did.  The night before Halloween and the Party itself.

 Last night, Dukkelisa and I were looking through a box full of old clothes from previous OTHERS.  I saw something very glittery that caught my eye!  I was so excited!  She didn;t think it would fit me at all, but I insisted that I try it on and it was MADE for me!  Yippy!!!!!!!!!  I have my first Halloween costume!  Now she wants to find something for Nan and Bess.

Nan and I got into a big argument last night.  She thinks Peter Pan is real and that Mimosa is Tinkerbell.  Mimosa can't stand being mistaken for Tinkerbell.  I was just trying to prevent a fight from happening between them, but we ended up arguing instead. 

I get to go to the school today.  I get kinda bored sometimes, as Dukkelisa is always so busy.  But she seems to need me today for some reason and I don't mind being there to comfort her.  I am reading David Copperfield right now, so that will give me something to do.

Oh, and we have some really pretty butterfly paper to put up in my bedroom.  It makes a border all across the wall.  I can't wait.  I adore butterflies!

Nan and Bess arrived.  Nan is a little girl with lots of red curls.  Bess is a baby, maybe around one years old.  I am supposed to be in charge of them for a whole month and then I get to decide what happens next.

I've sort of moved back into the castle.  It looks a little more homey now.  Dukkelisa put a stove in and I am now learning to cook.  I like the castle in some ways, in others, it seems so uninviting.  Sometimes there is rustling noises and whispers.  Ismay heard them too, so I know it wasn't just me. 

I really like Bess.  She is so sweet and cute.  I want to hold her all the time.  Nan is ok, but always wants to play.  I really don't play so much anymore.  I mean, I am 15 after all!  I am now sure how to amuse her.  I try to read stories to her, but I feel like I can't enjoy the story for myself. 

I have saved up enough money for a new wig!  I am really excited.  It's all black.  I don't think Dukkelisa will like it, but I will.  Maybe I can be a scary witch for Halloween!

Latest happenings in pictures: Cooking and Snow. 

There has been MAJOR changes in my world.  I don't even know what to think of them! 

First, I can't seem to call Edith anymore to come and play.  She just disappeared!  Just as I was getting use to having someone to be amused by, Dukkelisa brings in two new OTHERS.  The story is HERE.

Just as soon as I get better, Dukkelisa gets sick.  She's been very ill with pneumonia.  She is getting better each day, except the medication she has to take makes her sick for a couple of hours in the morning.  Why does something that is suppose to make a person feel better, taste bad or make you sick?  Weird.

Dukkelisa like to sew vintage clothes.  Sigh.  We were looking online at all kinds of pretty clothes, and I kinda liked the 1920's clothes, and some of the Edwardian dresses.  I really like the hats!  I love hats and wish I had a lot  more of them.  Dukkelisa cut out a newly designed pattern in the 1920's style and hopefully today we can both be out of bed and working in the sewing room.

Aunt Wendy is sending a new carrier for me.  I am so excited about that.  It's something that Dukkelisa can carry me in, something she said will help protect me when we go places.  I am so glad too.  It means we can be together more often.

Oh, and the shoes came.  They were too big.  She is going to order the next smallest size down and hopefully re-sell the bigger ones.  She says I have the oddest size feet of any girl she has ever known.

I have been very sick.  I noticed that I didn't feel like doing anything and I slept alot.  Then everyone started to tell me I looked yellow.  I hated that. 

Dukkelisa became very alarmed and put me to bed.  She gave me a good scrubbing with cleanser and it brought back a blush on my cheeks.  Then she made me a pretty blue gingham night gown, changed my hair and said I looked healthier without red tones next to my skin.  I am to rest for a long time and take this really bitter medicine for jaundice.

I don't like these photos" but here is where she put my jaundice photo's.

I am very tired,  I think I will just sleep now.

Dukkelisa wrote about me here and here.

I went with Dukkelisa to school today.  She was still making me mad with her comments about Edith being imaginary, so I ignored her.  At least I got to wear my fluffy yellow hoodie, I just love how cozy and soft it is.  On the way home, Dukkelisa said it was ok for me to believe in Edith and I felt a lot better.  Papa put up a new fancy light in the dollroom so that now all the houses in Peyton Place have a spot light.  Dukkelisa was so happy she hugged me.  I guess I am not mad at her anymore. Now, if I can just get her to make me a sweater and more pants and socks.

Dukkelisa thinks I have an imaginary friend.  Even Mimosa thinks it.  I think they are both lacking in imagination!  Edith and Mr Bear were back to play with me and I am so glad.  I don't care what anyone thinks...I have nice friends.

I was reading the story of Edith the Lonely Doll by Dare Wright yesterday and I guess I fell asleep and dreamed she and Mr Bear came to visit me.  She is such a cute little doll.  What a nice dream. 

I got a new room!  The health inspector came to the school and said that there were too many things in the kindergarten room and the teacher started putting things she didn't need into the hall.  There was a big white thing that Dukkelisa thought would make me a perfect room and she asked if she could have it!  The teacher said it was a theater, but we are not sure how that was.  The top has some kind of holders, and the teacher said it held puppets.  It doesn't matter, the room is just the right size for me.  The back of the room is wood half way up, so Dukkelisa nailed a shelf across the top of it so I could have a place to put my favourite things.  She also put it up on two white drawers so it is high enough for her to come and visit and sit comfortably in her chair.

Pictures of my new room is here.

Alma went to school the other day and I didn't get to go.  Now she has been hiding or something.  No one knows where she is.  Mimosa said she heard that Alma was busy buying a house for herself and trying to find decent clothes for winter.

It has been getting colder outside.  It felt like fall was coming the last few days.  I don't have any winter clothes either.  Dukkelisa made several long gowns, but I don't want to wear them.  I am trying to convince her to sell them on ebay, but she hesitates since it was a lot of work to make them.  I really just want some sweaters and tennis shoes, nothing fancy.

I saw her last night.  She was naked, blind and really small.  No face at all.  I know she couldn't see me, so I didn't say anything to her.  Dukkelisa was pleased and told me that she could feel her come alive.  I didn't care if she did.

This morning she gave her eyes and lips and hair.  It was really weird. The OTHER getting a face is here.   We all were told to wait in the living room, and then the OTHER came in.  She said her name was Alma, which she said meant soul.  Full of herself, she is.  Acting all mysterious and perfect.  The whole story is here.

I don't know what to think.  She is kinda ok.  I don't know.